Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya...

So my whole platoon has been growing mustaches as a joke for the past two weeks. Only problem is, I got nothin'. A 12 year old girl has a better chance of growing facial hair than I do. So this morning I had to catch up, for the good of the platoon of course. So with the quick application of a little boot polish I am the proud owner of one hell of a mustache. Kind of gross, I realize, but it was was either enhance the thing myself or admit defeat. You should see all the respect and admiration I've received these past few hours. Despite the praise, as soon as I'm done writing this (and I mean the very second I'm through) I'm sprinting to the sink to wash this nasty thing off. Don't worry, I'll be as good as new very soon. The physiological scars suffered by myself and my platoon may take a little more time however.